Animal Cracker Cookie Butter

Sometimes you just have to make something that is not even a little bit healthy.

And then sometimes that thing is so good, you have to share it on you “healthy” recipe blog. Love me anyway?

Although, I promise, it’s not that different calorically from any cookie butter you would buy at the store, and it is sososo delicious.

I do have a lingering question….If I dip an animal cookie in it’s own butter, is that wrong, like ethically? Is it like eating a cow while drinking it’s mothers milk?? Will I have to change religions because I totally broke all laws of Kosher eating??? Hang on, lemme finish my cheeseburger…

Okay, but for real, I think cheeseburgers are gross. Ground beef is just not appealing to me. But an animal cracker dipped in it’s own “butter”, that I can get behind! I have my priorities straight, I think.

So this “recipe” is two measly ingredients. Depending on the type of animal crackers you buy, you can make it vegan, gluten free, the whole 9 yards, as long as you’re not allergic to coconut. If you are, I’m so so sorry. That must suck.


Animal Cracker Cookie Butter

yield 1/2 pint

  • 1 cup animal crackers (regular, vegan, gluten-free, whatever suits you)
  • 4-5 tbs coconut oil, melted


  1. Place animal cookies in food processor, and process until only fine crumbs remain.
  2. Slowly 1 tbs at a time, stream in coconut oil. Let the processor run for 2-3 minutes between each additional tbs is added, and scrap down the sides of the processor often. It is somewhat of a process for the oil and cookie crumbs to come together in the right texture, but it is well worth the wait (and you don’t want to end up with overly fatty and runny cookie butter)!
  3. When the oil and cookie crumbs have formed a think, homemade-peanut-butter-like substance, transfer into a half pint jar and store at room temperature. Best used within 1 week.